


mine right now

by hocuspocusbaby



Category: The Maze Runner (Movies)
Genre: I AM CAUSING MYSELF PAIN, Jealous Newt (Maze Runner), M/M, are they in love? we will never know, can be read as newtmas but also just as friends, everyone misses minho, they (kinda) actually talk about their feelings for once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:55:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28818141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hocuspocusbaby/pseuds/hocuspocusbaby
Summary: While driving to the Last City to rescue Minho, Newt and Thomas talk about their worries about what will come next.Can be read as Newt/Thomas, but can also be read as Newt&Thomas.
Relationships: Newt & Thomas (Maze Runner), Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 25





	mine right now

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic I‘m publishing on ao3 and for the Maze Runner fandom!  
> Constructive criticism, feedback and comments are always welcome, thank you in advance for reading this, it means a lot to me!  
> English isn‘t my first language so please correct any spelling or grammatical errors.
> 
> This is dedicated to my friend E., who has been crying about Maze Runner with me since I discovered it a few weeks ago, and who has been watching every single edit and TikTok I sent her without complaint, even though it was a LOT. love you :)
> 
> ((I listened to Mine Right Now by Sigrid on repeat while writing this so feel free to cry about them to this song with me))
> 
> EDIT: the lovely flemoncake ( @go-catch-a-chickn on tumblr) made a moodboard for this fic, thank you so so so much!!!!

Someone was crying. Newt could hear them thrashing inside their sleeping bag in the car. Probably a nightmare.

He couldn‘t tell if it was Thomas or Frypan from the muffled noises, but then he remembered that they only had the one sleeping bag, which Thomas got that night. So not Frypan.

He briefly entertained the thought of going to wake Thomas up, but the three of them hadn‘t gotten a good night of sleep for a bloody week, at least. They all needed the rest, especially Tommy.

He continued pacing in the vicinity of the car, keeping watch while his friends slept. He didn‘t have to wonder what Thomas was dreaming about. It was the same for all of them, in some way or the other. Walls covered in ivy stretching so high the sky was barely visible. The metallic clanking of griever legs, the feeling of being chased. Alby, Chuck, Gally, Winston, _Minho_.

Newt felt the familiar pang in his chest at the thought of him. It‘d been six months, but Minho’s face as he was manhandled into the berg was still etched into his brain in all its heartbreaking detail.

He tried not to dwell on the ache that should be dull after this much time trying and failing to save him, but still felt sharp and stabbing.

He guessed Thomas dreamt about Teresa, too. Newt himself didn‘t. Her betrayal was a shock, and he was so incredibly angry at her, but this wasn‘t about her for him. Unless it was to see her eaten alive by grievers, or cranks, he wasn‘t picky, he saw no reason to waste another second on the girl.

It was different for Thomas though. Of course it was. He and Teresa had history (whatever it may be, Newt hadn‘t found it in himself to ask yet). Newt couldn‘t fault him for it, for thinking of her. If the situation had been flipped, if it had been Minho or Thomas to sell them out, he’d feel different too.

But it wasn’t, because his friends were bloody loyal, thank you very much.

The last months had been hell. They spent each day, and sometimes the nights as well, trying to find something that could help them save Minho and the others. Newt remembered endless hours intercepting WCKD’s radio conversations, hoping to find out when and how the kids would be transported. And when they finally, _finally_ got something, everyone jumping up from where they’d been sitting, not yet yelling in order to not miss anything important. He remembered Brenda being the first to hug him, throwing herself from her position next to him into his side and cheering.

What he remembered most was the way Thomas‘ shoulders sagged down in relief across the room. For just a second, anyone could‘ve missed it, if they hadn‘t paid attention. But of course, Newt paid attention.

What followed were even more sleepless nights hatching a plan. And a plan B, and C, just to be safe. Nothing was allowed to go wrong. They had one shot at this and they couldn’t fail. They couldn’t fail Minho, and Aris and Sonya.

Even though no one said the words, everyone knew, and poured all their energy into ironing out any and all possible wrinkles in their plan.

Suddenly, there was gravel crunching behind him and Newt whirled around, ready to scream for Thomas and Frypan to wake up and hurl himself at the crank.

How stupid of him to get lost in thought and forget about keeping an eye out for threats, like he was supposed to!

However, his half battle cry, half warning signal died in his throat.

“Tommy! Man, you scared me, don‘t creep up on a lad like that!“

Thomas raised both his arms in surrender, then rubbed one eye tiredly. “Sorry, didn‘t mean to. Just couldn‘t sleep, that‘s all.“

Newt glanced at the car, where Frypan was seemingly still sleeping soundly. _Good for him_ , Newt thought.

Thomas shuffled closer. “D‘you wanna go to sleep? I can take over for you, if you want.“

Newt shook his head. “Thanks, Tommy, but I‘m too bloody wired to sleep anyway.“

Thomas nodded in understanding, then settled against a boulder on the side of the road where they had parked the car. “I could keep you company, if you‘d like?“, he offered.

Newt sat down wordlessly, assuming a more dignified position than Thomas, who had one leg propped up, with his arm resting on it, and the other sprawled out if front of him.

For a while they just sat, Newt‘s gaze fixed firmly on Thomas‘ hand between them, ripping out blades of grass. When he ripped out a particularly large chunk, roots and dirt and all, Newt reached out to cover Thomas‘ hand with his own.

“You wanna talk about it?“

Instead of pulling his hand away like Newt had expected him to, Thomas turned his palm up, lacing his fingers with Newt‘s.

“I just want it to be over. All of this. The constant running, having to worry all the time. It‘s like it will never end, y‘know? There‘s always another puzzle piece missing until we can stop. First it was getting out of the maze, then it was surviving the scorch and finding the Right Arm. And when I thought that was it... Minho got taken, and Sonya and Aris, too. And through it all, everyone’s relying on me to tell them what to do, but I don’t know! I don’t know what we’re doing, where we’re going. And I keep dragging everyone in this mess with me. Right now you and Fry are out here with me instead of with the Right Arm, where you would be safe-“

“I already told you not to be a twat about that“, Newt intercepted, not having expected this much of an answer. Usually, when they asked each other if they wanted to talk, the answer was some variation of “Not really, but thank you for asking“.

It was difficult to shut Thomas up when he was asking questions, but getting him to actually open up about his feelings seemed to be as much of an impossible task as climbing the maze walls. Figured Newt would succeed at it.

Thomas let out a breath. “I‘m sorry. It‘s just, I was so sure the plan would work. I allowed myself to be hopeful, and look how it turned out. And now, if anything happens to Frypan or-“ He cleared his throat, then continued. “Or _you_. Newt, I can‘t have that. It‘d be my fault, and I can‘t have any more of my friends die for me.“

They both fell silent again. Newt wanted to argue that nothing would happen to him or Frypan, that they‘d be fine. But he knew there was a good chance all three of them would end up dead. He wanted to argue that they wouldn’t be dying for Thomas, but for Minho, to save him, but Thomas would find a way to blame himself anyway. And he’d be lying, because he would die for Thomas in a heartbeat.

“Do you ever think about the safe haven?“, Thomas asked after a while.

Newt looked over at his friend, who was watching the leaves on a tree on the other side of the road sway gently in the night air.

“I tried to imagine it, once“, he admitted. “Looked just like the glade, but without the bloody walls around it.“

Thomas gave a surprised laugh. “Yeah, that sounds nice. I haven‘t really thought about it like that before. I just imagine all of us, safe. Far away from all of this.“

Newt was tempted to ask if _all of them_ included Teresa, but thought it best not to push Thomas on the topic. A small part of him also really didn‘t want to know.

From his periphery, he could see Thomas turn towards him.

“Newt, I‘m so scared. I don‘t want to loose you. I want you to make it. And of course, everyone else, too. I just want you to get the future you deserve.“

Newt turned as well, looking at his friend. It sent a wave of pain through him to see Thomas, normally jumping right into the action, this worried.

He squeezed Thomas‘ hand in his own. “You know, Tommy, it‘s alright. I want that, too. But who knows what will happen. Just in case we don‘t get our happy ever after, I want you to know that it‘s okay. We all know how much it cost to get this far, and that it will cost something to get to the safe haven.“

„Newt, don‘t say it like that. That sounds like you‘re giving up on making it.“

„Hey, it‘s alright if we don‘t all end up at the safe haven together. Because you‘re mine right now. My friend, I mean. That’s all that counts, that we have each other now.“

And in the end, he was right.


End file.
